i got into work really late today. this was not by choice, but instead by the designs of a cruel, cruel world that sought fit to hide my keys from me for an annoyingly large portion of the morning.

i was all set to leave for work today and i was leaving the apartment i did the usual check of pockets for items.

cell phone? check.

house keys? check.

laptop? check.

car keys?

…

car keys?

…

“hey. where are my car keys?” i asked myself. and so began this morning’s fit of unhappiness…

there are a few places that i ordinarily leave my car keys. why my car keys are not attached to my house keys is a whole other issue that i don’t even want to get into right now, but let’s just posit for a moment that this makes sense and move on, shall we?

so yes…where was i? oh yeah, there are a few places that i leave my car keys. on top of the replay in the living room? nope. on top of the replay in my room? nope. on my dresser? no. on my desk? no. under my monitor on my desk? no. on the kitchen table? on the futon? tucked in the futon cover? on my bed? under my bed? inbetween the crevice between the wall and my bed? no, no, no, no, no, and no.

i started to then look at the stupid places where i’ve been known to put my keys, but really shouldn’t. in the pile of magazines on my floor? in my gym bag? in my laptop bag? on the floor next to the xbox? inbetween the loveseat cushions? under the futon? in the bookshelf? on the kitchen counter? in the fridge (don’t ask, it’s painful just thinking about it again…)? and still no.

then i started to get desperate. so i started to throw away things that were not my keys in an effort to reduce the clutter in my room that may be hiding my keys. and then i went through my checklist of places again. my place is only SO big.

about an hour and a half into the process, i started to give up. i did what any normal person would do at this point: i called mommy.

mommy however was not home and so she could not see if i had left my spare keys at my parent’s house or if i had lost those somewhere in my apartment as well. great. so i left a message on my mom’s answering machine and continued the search.

then she called me back a little frantic and i was explaining the situation to her. as i was explaining the situation, i decided to take a break from the search and instead rest and have a piece of chocolate.

the bag of hershey kisses was on my desk and as i reached into the bag, i got a kiss out and felt something abnormally large in the bag. as i looked into the bag i saw what it was…my car key.

now, you want to talk about highly improbable circumstances? apparently, last night when i threw my keys onto my desk, it slid on my desk and INTO the bag of kisses. as i searched and searched my place i looked everywhere except inside the bag of kisses, because, come on now, who puts keys in a bag of candy?

*sigh*