tv season

one of the things that people have been commenting on now that i don’t have a 1+ hour commute each way to work is how i will be able to watch all the tv that i used to watch. it’s true, i will have a lot of tv to watch and i’m a little scared that the new tv season is about to start. i can’t believe that september is already nearly here. where did the summer go?

i didn’t get to go mountain biking nearly as much as i wanted to tihs summer. i think that i’ll have to make an effort to go more while i can. it turns out that i tihnk i will be going to northstar this weekend, though. we’ll have to see! it’ll be the first time that i’ve gone there and i’ve got some anxiety going, but i think it will be okay. this reminds me that i need to buy some good gloves for the trip.

there’s got to be a way

my commute to work has not been good lately. i am sure that there has got to be a way to get to and from work in under 30 minutes, but i have yet to find it. it’s a little discouraging, but i’ll have to keep trying out other routes to see what works best. i think the thing that frustrates me is that it is only a 10 mile drive! all of these cars are getting in the way. it took me nearly an hour to get home last night. i think that i found a new route though that should dramatically cut down my travel time.

i think that i am going to try out some new lunch places, the goal is to not repeat until i’ve exhausted everything in the area. i eventually want to venture into japantown for lunch. i haven’t eaten there in ages!

food dilemma

i have been hunting around town for lunch and it seems that my taste in food has dramatically changed. maybe it’s because there weren’t many fast food options at my old job location, but i’ve become a total snob when it comes to lunch food. i don’t like eating fast food and i’ve actually lost my appetite when i do try and eat quick food.

i went to the ranch 99 market to eat from their lunch deli and i couldn’t finish the meal. this has never happened before. i used to LOVE their food. man, i hope this isn’t an indication for bad things to come! i would be sad if i can’t eat fast food anymore.

is it enough?

is it enough if someone feels bad for something that they’ve done wrong to not explicitly tell them that they exercised poor judgement and that you are disappointed or upset at them? i was thinking about that the other day when i was reading diana’s entry about her little mistake at work and how she was reprimanded. it was clear that the mistake was made and the person who made the mistake was obviously upset and sorry for making the mistake, yet they were still reprimanded. i suppose that it is part of the process to make it formally known that what was done was a mistake so that it would not be duplicated in the future.

at what point do we spare someone else’s feelings and just let things go by the wayside? is it a disservice to do so because then they will not learn a valuable lesson? hmmmm, things to ponder.

awful commute

today was the worst commute i’ve had to work so far. it took me nearly 45 minutes to travel nearly 10 miles. =P i think that i really need to start exploring backroad options more, but everytime i’ve tried to take a backroad, it has taken me a ridiculously long time to get to my destination.

i’m currently contemplating what to do for lunch, i’m starving. i know that i have some errands to run at lunch time so i think that i may have to pick up a quick lunch somewhere. i’ve been trying to get out and meet people for lunch, but it just doesn’t look like the timing has been working out properly for me yet. maybe after i settle in better, i’ll have more opportunities.

how could this happen to me

how could this happen to me
–simple plan

I open my eyes
I try to see but I’m blinded by the white light
I can’t remember how
I can’t remember why
I’m lying here tonight

And I can’t stand the pain
And I can’t make it go away
No I can’t stand the pain

How could this happen to me
I’ve made my mistakes
Got nowhere to run
The night goes on
As I’m fading away
I’m sick of this life
I just wanna scream
How could this happen to me

Everybody’s screaming
I try to make a sound but no one hears me
I’m slipping off the edge
I’m hanging by a thread
I wanna start this over again

So I try to hold onto a time when nothing mattered
And I can’t explain what happened
And I can’t erase the things that I’ve done
No I can’t

How could this happen to me
I’ve made my mistakes
Got nowhere to run
The night goes on
As I’m fading away
I’m sick of this life
I just wanna scream
How could this happen to me

I’ve made my mistakes
Got nowhere to run
The night goes on
As I’m fading away
I’m sick of this life
I just wanna scream
How could this happen to me


despite our best efforts, one of the most difficult challenges in life are those that we could never anticipate. they are the things that terrorize you under a beautiful summer afternoon when your day seems to be as normal as any other. it is during these trying times that we must gather our strength, our fortitude, and our undying resolve to face the day and its challenges.

it doesn’t hurt to shake your fist at the blue sky and scream:


range of emotions

it’s incredible the complete range of emotion that i can feel in such a short time frame. completely amazing. i could be riding high from a huge breakthrough at work and experience one of those defining moments that makes programmers change from wanting to BFG everything in sight to just BFG specific monsters. and then, without warning, i could come toppling down with a crash mightier than the tech burst and suffer the immense agony that can only be likened to the sound of an atom splitting.

it’s amazing that we have such a huge capacity to love and hate. it is so amazing to me that we can feel such jolly jubilation one moment and then such dark depression the next.

some people feel that it’s not worth reaching the highest highs if that also means that it sets you up for the lowest of lows. i have always believed that it is always worth it to explore the happiest that you are capable of, and then pushing the envelope to experience bliss, even at the risk of being so low for so long that it feels like you’re up because you just don’t know what it is was like to feel that kind of wonder.

i think it is the agony of happiness. i wouldn’t have it any other way, even if it hurts now. some of my friends appear to be going through a rough time and i just wanted to tell them, though it may seem bleak now, opening yourself to the kind of joy that people have romanticized in novels, plays, and movies is the only way that i really believe you should live life. so much attention has been written about this kind of love and agony because it is something that we should all strive so much for. it’s an ideal, and shouldn’t we all aim high?

i think the best example i’ve ever heard of this was in the movie love actually.

Daniel: Well, you know – I thought it might be something worse.
Sam: [incredulous] Worse than the total agony of being in love?
Daniel: Oh. No, you’re right. Yeah, total agony.

70-200, baby

i just ordered the canon 70-200mm f/4L. i cannot wait for it to arrive. it’s in pennslyvania right now. unfortunately, it is scheduled to arrive after i’ve left for monterey so it looks like i won’t be able to play with it until next week some time. oh well, that’s just too bad.

i also bought a circular polarizer and a step up ring for the 70-200mm so that it can use the 77mm polarizer. man, filters are expensive when they start getting that big.

i think that this will be the last lens purchase of mine for a while now. i don’t think that there will be anything else i need. i am very curious to see how it does compared to its bigger 2.8 IS cousin. i guess there will be a shoot out soon.

worst morning ever

i’ve had a really rough morning. sometime over the night there was a black out in the apartment. power was restored around 6AM this morning. i slept through it all just fine, but was woken up by a very bad dream. when i woke up i felt awful and i looked to see what time it was and i saw that flashing time of 12:36. uh oh. i thought that i had overslept so when i checked the other clock to see what time it really was, i didn’t believe it when it read 6:30AM. i checked another clock and sure enough it really was 6:30AM. i reset my alarm clock and went back to sleep.

i got woken up again at 8AM feeling even less rested than when i first woke up. the bad dream was still on my mind and i did not get a restful sleep. now i feel exhausted and i have a long day ahead of me…

i think i need a donut.

embarassing confession

while i was shooting the wedding last week, i was lugging around a particularly heavy lens on my camera. throughout the night i was holding the camera with my right hand.

i think i started to develop a blister on my thumb because it was rubbing against the camera and the weight of the camera was causing a lot of stress on my thumb. is it weird that i think that i have to develop a callous on my thumb to take pictures?


the things photographers do to take a good picture…